September 2010


A monthly advice column

This month: guest columnist Brendon Small

Dear Sedaratives,

I’m a full-time carpenter. Is there any chance I might be the messiah?

Blake H.
Tuscaloosa, Ala.

Dear Blake,

I’ve said this a hundred times, just because you’re a smug carpenter who pontificates doesn’t make you the messiah. But then again, you might be.There’s only one way to find out: Perform a miracle. Walk on air. Take a running jump off a very high building and walk in place. Write me and let me know what happens. Either way, there is no God.


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Brendon Small is the writer, musician, and cocreator for Adult Swim’s Metalocalypse and Home Movies. He is also the author of the highest-charting death metal album(s) in recorded history.

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